If you’re in the States, like I am now, you have to be dead not to notice all the headlines about Kate Gosselin’s new body.
What abs of steel! What perky breasts! More importantly: Did she or didn’t she have botox?
If you’re scratching your head right about now, which can only mean that you’re a little bit dead, then allow me: Kate Gosselin is the former co-star of the reality show, Jon & Kate plus 8, about her eight children – sextuplets and twins.
The couple got a pretty nasty divorce not that long ago and the show ended, but Kate has remained in the limelight, mostly for her fabulous new body.
The thing is, when I see this 35-year-old woman posing in a bikini with nary any body fat or wrinkles and the confession that she spends hours each day working out, it just makes me sad.
Because where the media sees beauty, I see pain.
The whole thing brings me back to my divorce many years ago when my mornings were spent on the treadmill and my evenings at the Lake Forest dog park. In between, I did some work and ate not that much, on account of the terrible stomach problems I was having due to, you got it, stress.
What I’m trying to say is I got really skinny way back then. I’m not going to put too fine a point on it but let’s just say I weighed over 20 pounds less than I do now. I was thin. Really, really thin. And except for someone I know very well who would love it if I were nothing but a bag of bones, I don’t look worse now, just more padded.
My point is not to extol weight gain or weight loss but rather to suggest that the post divorce devotion to the body is really a reflection of inner turmoil.
And while I am the last person to lecture about positive body image since I am always on some kind of diet or internally berating myself for not being thinner, in my experience, whether I am up a few pounds or down a few pounds matters more to me than it does for men.
I’ve actually had more than one guy tell me that they like a little something to “hold onto.”
Which is another way of saying, with Kate Gosselin’s new body, there is nothing to hold onto.
Which is really another way of saying, I’ll be glad when I’m back in Israel and won’t have to see her stupid tanned body splashed across every magazine cover.